Children are worth it
/Question 3: Share a transforming experience like Saul to Paul which came about reading Skip’s article(s).
During a difficult time in my life, I took time off from work to be quiet and pray about the situation. One day I studied in a Christian Science reading room, where the attendant asked me if I had thought of taking class instruction. Nobody had ever asked me this before. That day I found myself reading the bound volumes, and an article by Allison W. Phinney, Jr., grabbed my attention. I had never heard his name, so I wrote down his name along with a quote from the article that meant much to me. After this, I took a great interest in reading all of Skip’s articles.
A couple of years later I attended Skip’s class and found it life-changing. I loved how he gave us permission to pray in the absolute. I remember him saying, “We sometimes talk to others in the relative, but we pray in the absolute.” Even though I had grown up in Christian Science, I had not learned this and instead had a feeling of dualism, of being a struggling mortal, far from God, which is old theology, definitely not Christian Science. This permission to see myself and others as perfect, sinless, immortal—right now—radically changed my life and practice of Christian Science. Healing now made sense and became much easier. I stopped being so easily duped and frightened by the deceitful material senses and learned more about trusting God, Spirit, ever-present Truth and Love, as truly substantial.
Not long after taking class, I had an appointment with Skip, who casually asked if my husband and I were thinking of starting a family. I replied that we had a cat, and we both laughed. My husband and I had been married almost 10 years at this point, but we had both grown up in families with dysfunction and neither of us dared return to family life as we had known it. My dad had attended a British boarding school where there was abuse and bullying. He regretted his own marriage and children and advised me repeatedly not to have children saying, “They’re not worth it.”
However, Skip’s simple question about starting a family planted a seed and made me think more deeply about the issue. I realized that I didn’t have to believe what my dad had told me about children. A few years later, without ever discussing it, my husband and I both decided we were ready to start a family. Our two children are grown up now, but raising them was like a second childhood for us that was so much fun. We never had any regrets and never will.
Children, as well as adults, are worth it. Skip knew this and I am grateful to have been his student.